I'm So Sorry...

i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry...
i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry...
i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry...
i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry...
i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry... i'm so sorry...


i know i own u an apology... even i said it for thousand times still not enough to let ur hurt away...
i really didn't mean to hurt u, i still want to care about u, but... i know u're too painful and can't let me do it...


3 months later... this is my first time to face it all...
i'm so sorry i didn't tell the truth at that moment...
i'm so sorry i still can't tell u the truth, i'm afraid i'll hurt u again...
i'm so sorry i still love u, but the reality stop me for it all...
i'm so sorry i want a blueprint that i can see our future...


but... after all... i can't see anything in us...
even i still love u, but i can't accept it all...


i'm appreciated u love me more than i love u
i'm appreciated u were the one that gave it all to me
i'm appreciated i'm always come first to u
i'm appreciated u always share ur mind and mood with me


but... i'm still so so so sorry...
hope one day, i really hope one day, one day we can chat again...
one day when we meet again, we still can like usual to greet and talk...
one day... we can like the same as before...


well... i hope...
now i just wish u can feel better and get up again...

It's Time

i'm afraid to see our face sudden changes,

there is no more language between us, how to understand it?

it's time to turn away,

from now, giving up everlasting that we were desire,
i don't want to accept it all, but you still show up in my dream,

giving me warm and comfort me tenderly,

it's so hard to bear it, even just a minute,

hating myself so much to let it go so easily,

i thought i can take it and being as cool as a cucumber,

but being strong is not the kind of relief i wanted,

and pretending i can living well also,

i'm afraid to perceive your distracting eyes,

and don't want to argue all the lies you said,

it's time to let it go,

hating myself so much i let you go so easily,

i thought this is cool, this is tender,

but i forgot we are the same, you are as fragile, as sad as i am,

wishing so much i can just open my hands,

watching you leave and let it be cool,

but... fortitude, is all i can give to your freedom,

then what else can i do?

Can't Go Back

it is so unbelievable when u said u not trust me at all
well... what should i respond?
u already said it, what should i explain?

that is really hurt when u said u not trust it at all
then i'll say... when the words u said, u already broke everything between us
now i don't know what should i do, and what should i trust
as u said, now i really don't trust in us anymore...

there is no credence at all...
and i can't go back anymore...
even i want to, but...
it is hard to go back like before...

Please Don't Call Me Again...

i don't think u should call me again,
and i never think that u will call me again like this,
well u don't have any reason to call me, do u?

do u remember...
i gave u my love to borrow, but u just gave it away?
i really did love u, but what about u?
what did u done to hurt me?
u can't expect me to be fine, and i don't expect u to care.

and after all, i already move on, restart my good life,
and now am doing fine, and try to believe in all again, working hard to open my heart,
then how could u just rang me so easily and ruin all i just built.

i don't think it is appropriate to call me next,
and plz don't call me again,
don't tell me all the bullshit cos i won't believe it,
if u really do regret, then u shouldn't lie before,
and now it's too late to make it and it is too late to try it again,

so... MOVE ON! IT'S UR TIME TO MOVE ON!

What My Life Is About?

people says, in our life, most of the time we're waiting for everything

waiting for metro, waiting for bus, waiting for a phone call, waiting for tomorrow,

waiting for dreams come true, waiting for become rich, waiting for a shot to leave,

waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting and keep waiting...

what about me?

waiting for u deny me, waiting for u to talk bullshit always

i'm just waiting that everything i say then u deny me after

guess this is how we live in these 21 years...

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i'm so immature cos u said so
i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i'm so useless cos u think so

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i can't find any jobs cos u deny it all i found

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i can't pay myself cos i don't have job and u have to pay me still

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i still can't figure it out what i want in the future cos all i thought u deny it

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i still stuck in this suck college cos i'm not smart enough to get rid of it

i'm so sorry i'm 21 now, but i don't have my own thought, mates said this then i accept cos i do really think this is what i want, but u never understand it

who's the one told me, choose ur love and love ur choice?

i'm so sorry if can all over again, i'll choose not to born on this world and give u all the troubles

so bad... i can't all over again, then... who can take me away and help me to get rid of this?

waiting...

i'm waiting for u deny the thing i say next...

Growing Up

i used to worry a lot about who i be with when i grew up,
like how much money i'll make,
or someday i'll become some big deal.
sometimes the things u most want didn't happen and sometimes the things u never expected happen does.


i don't know,
u meet thousands of people and none of them really touch u,
and then u meet one person and ur life is changed forever.


Claire xoxo

Never Change

if u can give me some more little time...

wish you could take me away,
pretend that i'm ur baby,
somewhere faraway, somewhere in the shade,
somewhere in the rain, somewhere we can play,
somewhere we can be free and run away,


one day i'll take u away,
kiss you and call u my baby,
somewhere in the sky, somewhere we can play,
somewhere where we don't need to run and hide,
somewhere down below, somewhere in the snow,
somewhere where the sun will shine all night,


cos i really wanna take u away,
cos i wanna walk with u into space,
and pick out all of the stars in the sky,
and place them all on ur face,
cos i won't let u change,
never change...


cos i promise to give...
you the rest of...
MY LIFE...


Claire xoxo

I Need You Now

i've been searching but all that i found is everywhere that i go...

is standing alone in the crowd...

i need u now... i need u now...

Claire xoxo

Midterm...

During the school life... all i hate is exam! Midterm and Finals! Now i'm on midterm... :( but thank God! the subject of my major really don't need to study a lot!


Oh well... here comes the problem, don't need to study?! but i need to draw a lot of works to done my midterm, this subject need to draws, that subject need to draw, blah blah blah blah blah! so now i have to do my best, don't sleep too much all week, actually, if i don't need to sleep, then would be great to compete with time to draw all the works, and let all be done before the deadline!


so then... wish me luck! i need to back to draw :(

One of my works

Claire xoxo

For You, For All My Love

i read a poem by E.E. Cumings lately, was very real and touching :)

I Carry Your Heart With Me

I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear;

and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)

I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)

I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;

which grows higher then soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

Claire xoxo

We Are Young

growing up means losing, i don’t wanna lose every single time am with u, after a couple years we’re going to separate, even we’ll still see each other, but that is not the same anymore, so let we be united and when we’re 27 or 87, we still got the memory can talk bout it together :) cheers The Round Table

tonight we are young 

so let's set the world on fire

we can burn brighter than the sun

so if by the time the bar closes

and u feel like falling down

i'll carry u home

Claire xoxo

It's Not Easy

new semester...
new profs...
same classmates...
same troubles...


nothing is easy for me...


but!!! i'll try my best with all i can...


God bless me...


Claire xoxo

Il Dolce Far Niente

the last whole year was so crazy!
the new campus, new department, new subjects, new profs, new classmates


but the only thing wasn't change is my mates are still with me
in the new campus, new department, studying new subjects,
against the new classmates and profs!


and the most impressed me is... our final projects are so crazy too!
drawing, painting, playing instruments, creating works, etc.
but am kind of enjoyed in it!


and because of the final project, we lost our Christmas...
no celebration, no party, no friends, no family...
but!!! it was great bout the New Year, everybody back together
Christmas gift exchanged, and counted down together at the riverside
it was the best memory in the last year :)


so now, finally am on the winter vacation
learning how to let my life become "il dolce far niente"
in Italian means
trying to learn the Italian lifestyle, doing nothing, but it's sweet and relax
and my vacation is almost like this now... :)


anyway, wish everyone HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012!
wish u all wishes come true, health well, everything goes great and good luck! :)


Claire xoxo